60. Deathrow High

I pecked Su Leng on the cheek to display our bond before I left. We hugged close for a moment and discerned no sexual charge. It was a condition of innocence and purity like those shared by children. What came on strong was love…and arguably love is strongest in the absence of an erection. This I noticed too during the rave. Despite the physical flirtation with Ai Leen, I was soft throughout. Dancing Without Genitals: A Freeland from Pretence. The spot between our legs is the bane of our existence! Because it has to be satiated, we therefore fake our behaviour. If we are ‘mannequins,’ we’d be angels. Perhaps, the simple act of dancing returns us to this cherubic state, the energy calms the nerves and detours blood from entering the penis in excitement to the brain.

My drive home was pleasant. It was already evening when I got back. After a detailed shower scrub to remove dead skin and dirt, I picked up the phone and dialled Ai Leen. With the time spent with Su Leng having done its purpose, I was ready to see her. Love is shining through, and I am a knight that has just polished his armour, dying to exhibit.

The depth and the sincerity of my emotions made me feel love is separate from sex. The best sensations in the world have nothing to do with that three-letter word. Instead, love is the feeling when you feel belonged. Love is the joy coursing through the veins when others give strength and support near moments of surrender. Love is even sadness. It is present when tears mar the eyes during the funeral of a dear one. Love is beautiful…

…So beautiful that you don’t mind being impotent. It’s a distraction whenever you ‘rise.’ It weakens the emotion, and may even degrade it to the common filth of pornography. Our minds become obsessed with sex and behave like dogs wanting to fuck any bitch we see. Life is simple if the dick is only for pissing. But if this were the case, we wouldn’t need it in the first place. Evolution would decide that there would be no need for genitals, and thus find alternatives for procreation and the survival of the species.

That night, Ai Leen and I lay tenderly in bed. I wasn’t my horny self. In place, we lovingly talked and caressed. Ironically, we were naked, but we felt like wholesome beings of heaven twisted and rolled into a ball of placid hearts.

AI generated art prompted by author

All characters and events, other than those clearly in the public domain, are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental