64. Deathrow High
It was exactly 3:26 p.m. when we arrived at Villa seafood restaurant. Ai Leen’s a small eater. Thus, the onus is mine! We settled for spicy-sweet-sour crabs, butter-fried prawns and oyster omelette. Also, I ordered toddy – an alcoholic drink from fermented coconuts; it’s perfect with stout.
Delicious food is an aphrodisiac. Not that it makes me horny (when am I ever not?), but rather, delicious food is an outright stimulant! Ai Leen disappeared as crustaceans and molluscs took over. If not for the fact that it’d be morally disgusting, I would have moaned and tensed my toes every time marine flesh touched my palate - the rich crunchy prawn interior, the golden red crab roe, the silky succulent oysters swathed in fluffy eggs…ahhh…
As per my silent prediction, we left the village with our stomachs at the brink of explosion. I was reminded of an urban tale: Two men overate in a fancy restaurant. One of them…a rich fuck, took off his gold ring and threw it on the floor, telling his partner, “If you can pick it up, it’s yours!” His friend, driven by easy fortune, bent down for the challenge. As he did, his tummy kaboomed!!!
I had to sit erect whilst I drove lest I constricted my abdomen. There was a horrendous discomfort akin to sea creatures crawling out of my maw. Such is the price of gluttony! If we’d repeated our romance in the car, all that semi-digested substances would’ve been vomited out! Sharing ‘that-which-was-once-called-seafood’ surely is no one’s idea of a perfect date. Moreover, imagine the puke-soiled clothes…
…And DON’T even mention my vehicle’s upholstery!
We reached Ipoh in time for dinner! More food? No way! Not until tomorrow. I did mention “nga choi kai” (bean-sprout chicken), which was Ipoh’s specialty, but was immediately reprimanded for. That night, we drove around the city, sightseeing, after we’d checked into Syuen Hotel. Ai Leen had never really been to Ipoh…she’d stopped over for lunch a few times at the House of Mirrors, but that was basically it.
In fact, that was basically it! Other than food, there was nothing else to this little city-that-ever-eats… She hadn’t missed a thing!
In the hotel room, we continued our conversation from this afternoon. She told me this was the first time she’d danced naked. She thoroughly enjoyed her new experience.
“O’ you dance naked?” I played a game of pretence, “Hmm…how I’d like to look.”
“No you can’t. I dance naked alone…unless you join me.” Ai Leen flashed her lashes like some comical whore.
“I won’t mind!”
“I’m sure you won’t. But that wouldn’t be the same...I wouldn’t be alone…” she teased.
“I’ll peep! Like…like the way they do in blue films. There’s this one that I watched…where, where there are gloryholes...and, and two guys are secretly watching some chicks change in the locker…and...”
“I don’t want to hear.” With that, she shut her ears…
She proceeded to take a shower. I followed her to the bathroom, believing it was my prerogative to do so. At the entrance, she turned round and placed her hand on my chest, pushing me gently away. I felt like a motorist adhering to the outstretched palm of a traffic police…
“You’re not coming in,” she asserted authoritatively.
“Why…?” My voice sounded dejected, my head confused…had I done something wrong…? Women! Can’t fucking understand them!
“No reason; you’re just not coming in. I want to shower alone.”
“But…but…we always bathe together… Why? Why can’t I shower with you?” The desperation was clear in my tone. I couldn’t believe this. We’re supposed to be on holiday, now…now she’s blotting me out…! From my own fucking holiday! What the hell is going on?
“Not this time.” The door shut in my face…
Like a soldier that’d lost his comrades in battle, I walked with head hung low to the bed. Inside, I wished for some window linking the bath with the room so I could sneak a peek at her soaping her tits.
I’m hard, I got to admit. I’ve been, since trotting behind her ass like a pony. Imagine my disappointment. With nothing left to do, I rationally conducted a study on the possible deductions:
A) She’s pissed! About…? I dunno… She did act weird in the car, accusing me of being double-minded. And…and…she didn’t want to hear my porny tales… Was I being insensitive? Am I just a…prick??? Have I been acting only as a penis toward her…and nothing more? Do I demand too much sex? Is she begi…beginning to think that I’m nothing but a perv…a…a…hamsap low??? Wh…what??? Orrrrrrr……
B) It’s a fucking test!!! She’ll come out like a pussycat. And I’ll be rewarded for my patience! This was how I preferred…so I rubbed my member and congratulated him on his future success…
When she did finally come out, she didn’t appear to be a pussycat at all. Ai Leen was dressed, in shorts and t, and drying her hair with the hotel towel. There wasn’t a hint of seduction in the air.
I acted cool…like it was ok…I didn’t try to touch her… I just sat there with my hardy boy…pretending that it wasn’t there! She spoke not, so I did the obvious…I got up and headed for the shower. It was my turn for a bath.
AI generated art prompted by author except for images of Villa seafood restaurant, toddy and stout, spicy-sweet-sour crabs, butter-fried prawns and oyster omelette, nga choi kai and House of Mirrors
All characters and events, other than those clearly in the public domain, are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental